Welcome back everyone! It felt great to be sat on the sofa on Sunday evening with a couple of beers, some generic, triangular crisps and Redzone on the TV. It lasted about 30 minutes before I was kicked onto my computer and the TV was showing Hey Duggee [Sure you don’t mean Slay Duggee? Ed].

My phone battery was used up pretty quickly as I jumped between Twitter and the ESPN app. This is the only league I am interested in during game time, any other league can wait until Monday morning.

Michael, I’m sorry for the absolute mess you have inherited and your score this week is an example of the work you have to do but even if you aren’t successful points-wise, you can still be successful here!

I’m going to stick to the same categories I did last year but if there are any others that people think would be good to include, just let me know and I’ll ignore you until I have a decent pick in the 2019 draft.

Worst Line-up Decision

I’ll start with the hardest one. Looking at the line-ups last week, I honestly don’t think anybody made any massive errors and only with the benefit of hindsight can some be pointed out. There are only really two possible candidates.

Chris playing Doug Baldwin when everyone knew that he was carrying an injury was a risky play but I think it came down to choosing a high risk/high reward option in Baldwin, or a low risk/low reward option in Geronimo Allison. Allison was the better play in the end but I wouldn’t have put my reputation - as a runner up - on the line over it before the games were played.

The other was by our debutant, Michael. I don’t know if he was influenced by Cam’s high start-up draft pedigree but starting him over Drew Brees against the Bucs? Are we sure we revoked Hamza’s access so he couldn’t keep putting Cam in the starting line-up?

Flitwick Fireflies - 1

Most Impactful Injury

The only true major injury of note was Delanie Walker being ruled out for the season, but Jason had planned ahead and has Jonnu Smith already to go. Greg Olsen being out for a while [He “hopes to play again in 2018”. Ed] is more of a problem for Scott, as his TE depth is a little more iffy. Maybe Dolphins rookie Mike Gesicki steps up in Week 2. Marcus Mariota may have nerve damage in his throwing arm but Olly has Keenum as his backup and Chris is a little shallow behind Baldwin but he should cope for a couple of weeks.

The most impactful injury in my opinion was the Leonard Fournette one. It cost Scott in a tight matchup, but more importantly it adds to the idea that Fournette is always at risk of missing time and that would worry me in the long term in his position.

Andover Sandslashers - 1

Closest Matchup

Most of the matchups this week were pretty conclusive, with one game being a 61-point margin and the rest between 24-36 points. Week 1 is where almost everyone is available, no byes, fewer injuries and fewer suspensions so the point totals tend to be higher and therefore the gaps are relatively bigger than usual.

Scott (-24.3) had the narrowest defeat but Michael wasn’t far behind (-24.9) and even though Scott scored 43 points more than Michael, they have the same record.

Andover Sandslashers - 1

Unluckiest Loser

Scott scored 115 points, enough to beat the Fireflies, the Bandits, the Spartans, the Chargers, the Seahawks and the Pythons. But Scott didn’t play them, he played me, and 115 in week 1 ain’t gonna cut it!

You could argue that injuries played a big part. If Fournette had Yeldon’s 14.4 points and Olsen carried on playing, the 24-point gap would have been a lot closer. But coulda, woulda, shoulda!

Andover Sandslashers - 1

The Buzzsaw

Poor Josh, facing a Flyers team who looked set for UKD glory last season until Zeke finally served his suspension at the worst fantasy time and is now looking for vengeance.

Dermy swapped that headache for a Shiny New Saquon to pair with Joe Mixon who looks worth his 1.03 (I think) pick last year. 5 of Dermy’s STARTING players hit 20 points (I’m counting 19.8 as 20 for dramatic purposes). He could even have the 7th highest scorer on his bench! Not even McCoy getting 2.6 points could stop Dermy from starting this season as the front-runner and bookies’ favourite for Britannia Bowl III glory.

Irish Flyers - 1

Highest Individual Player Score

Fitz-magic topped 40 points against a supposedly great Saints D, with the likes of Lattimore, Williams and Crawley!!! But he didn’t help anybody in this league, as he was a free agent, so the second place player was Olly’s Tyreek Hill with 38.8 points, which incidentally was more than all but one of the Oxford Pythons’ other starters put together.

Just like the Cowboys, Olly can’t build his team around one star player and expect to win, but if Mariota can feel his arm, Freeman can stop getting his bell rung, Hogan becomes part of Bill’s plans, Doyle doesn’t get vultured by Ebron, and Henry doesn’t get hit by more lightning, then maybe he can get his first win against Jason and his 2nd worst scoring Chargers!

Oxford Pythons - 1

Roll of Honour

Sandslashers 🏆🏆🏆
Fireflies 🏆
Flyers 🏆
Pythons 🏆